God has been speaking to me for years about being open with people to share my testimony and the gospel. I've often been told that I have a gift of wisdom and that I have something to offer people through words and encouragement. But, I've let fear and past hurts shut me down. I've said "no" to God when what I really want is to say "yes". I see others who are saying yes every day and having an impact. I want that too.
I never thought that I would go on a mission trip. I'm not a traveler, and the thought of going to a foreign country where I don't speak the language is daunting and sometimes overwhelming. But again, I would see others who were profoundly impacted by their experiences. Then I heard these words come out of my mouth: "Maybe I could go on a domestic mission trip". Barely a month later, I had a choice whether to actually go on one. I wanted to say no; I was tempted to let the same fears hold me back. But ultimately, deep in my heart, I want to say yes to God and trust Him to take care of me in every situation. So I said yes, and waited for the fear and anxiety to come. It never did.
On the trip, I was afraid of feeling trapped and overwhelmed. I was afraid that I would be expected to do more than I could handle. Instead I felt like a valuable part of the team. I had freedom to make choices—to engage or to hold back. We were coached about the best way to engage with people, share God with them, and bless them. It even seemed simple. I didn't have to try to be someone else—I have my own stories of God's love and faithfulness from my life. I sincerely want others to experience the love, acceptance, forgiveness, and new identity that I have experienced through being in relationship with God. I have something to uniquely offer that no one else can.
Back home after the missions trip, I see my neighbors that God has been talking to me about for months, my elderly mom that I know doesn't believe in God, a car salesman that has a skin condition, a waitress that may or may not know Jesus—how can I not offer them this hope, this truth, this relationship that I've experienced with Jesus? I don't have to have just the right words. I just need to use my own words to show I care, by talking about the hope I have and how I genuinely want them to have it. Now—unlike before, when it was easier to say no because fear was driving me—I can say yes because I know I have something valuable to offer, and that it pleases God to give it to them.
1 Peter 3:13-15: “Who is there to harm you if you prove zealous for what is good? But even if you should suffer for the sake of righteousness, you are blessed. And do not fear their intimidation, and do not be troubled, but sanctify Christ as Lord in your hearts, always being ready to make a defense to everyone who asks you to give an account for the hope that is in you, yet with gentleness and reverence.”